#1The Monologue
The prediction market Kalshi, where people have wagered some two hundred sixty billion dollars this year, has hired a former FBI agent to run its anti-money-laundering division. Which means somewhere on that platform there is now a market on whether he'll succeed — and somebody is betting against him. Re: NPR — Kalshi taps former FBI agent to fight against money laundering
The AI startup Manus raised more than five hundred million dollars this week, reportedly doubling its valuation to four billion. It managed this shortly after regulators blocked Meta from buying it for two billion. So the fastest way to become worth twice as much — is to not be for sale. Re: CNBC — AI startup Manus raises $500 million in first funding round since Meta breakup
Amazon announced it will stop requiring local governments to sign nondisclosure agreements before discussing data centers, and will instead publish its energy and water usage once a year. The company says it wants to be a better neighbor — which is an unusual promise from the entity that already knows what's in your garage. Re: TechCrunch — Amazon responds to data center backlash, says it no longer uses NDAs
Six hundred forty-eight people in Spider-Man costumes gathered at New York Comic Con to break the record for the largest Spider-Man gathering, and came up thirty-seven short of the 2023 mark set in Malaysia. A Guinness adjudicator was present for the official count.
The European Space Agency released video of an astronaut-costumed Pikachu plush being given a guided tour of the International Space Station by astronaut Sophie Adenot. The toy logged sixty-seven days and roughly 1,040 orbits.
A hiker on the South Fork Trail in Lincolnton, North Carolina spotted an opossum dangling more than ten feet above the water from a fishing hook. When the rescue pole proved too short, the Carolina Wildlife Conservation Center's lead rehabilitator climbed the tree and brought the animal down herself.
#5Meanwhile, In Satire
'FBI Classifies Not Finishing Hamburger As Seditious Activity' — The Onion, https://theonion.com/fbi-classifies-not-finishing-hamburger-as-seditious-activity/
'Plastic Bag That Blew Into Modern Art Museum Sells For $10 Million' — The Babylon Bee, https://babylonbee.com/news/plastic-bag-that-blew-into-modern-art-museum-sells-for-10-million/
'Man installs placebo thermostat to let family think they're putting the heating on' — NewsThump, https://newsthump.com/2026/10/08/man-installs-placebo-thermostat-to-let-family-think-theyre-putting-the-heating-on-3/
'Band Forecasts Thick Layer of Mid-Set Stage Fog' — The Hard Times, https://thehardtimes.net/music/band-forecasts-thick-layer-of-mid-set-stage-fog/
Customs officers at Miami International Airport stopped a traveler arriving from Havana and discovered six taped plastic cylinders sewn into his undergarments, containing eight yellow-faced grassquits and two blue grosbeaks. He told officers the birds were for personal use.
#7The Groaner
I tried to catch some fog yesterday. Mist.
